It has been remarked that every novel could plausibly be titled Lost Illusions, and this is particularly true of Austen's work. The romanticism of sensibility, the autonomy of pride, the reflexive self-valuation of prejudice, and the pragmatism of persuasion--all are so many illusions to be lost. (It has been remarked that the two main characters of Pride and Prejudice think that they are the actors in the novel Dignity and Perception.)
But then, has anyone ever stood up from a Jane Austen novel and, clapping their hands, felt the title to represent a lesson learned? "From now on, I will be less easily persuaded [sensible, prejudiced]--that's settled." [But there are novels that we put down having decided to change our lives.] Austen seems rather to be evaluative: the only way to enjoy her novels is as affirmations of values we already share.
I have always been appalled when anyone has expressed a nostalgia for Austen's world. It seems to me rather like a circle of hell: socially impoverished, ignorant, narrow, dominated by idle chatter and petty envy, a kind of barely-subdued Hobbesian war of all against all. Malice is everywhere; solitude is forever besieged.
The law that we must refer to Jane Austen as "witty" reminds me that we never apply that adjective to someone we like. It is impossible that Austen would like all of her readers back, so to speak. What her titles announce is not that the books are "love stories," but that they are records of mistakes, mortifications. Elizabeth Bennet is mistaken about nearly everything (Catherine Moreland, too). Emma Woodhouse progressively isolates herself from the good will of the community she lords over. Anne Elliot has fucked everything up years before her novel begins.
Anne Elliot is shuffled around England like so much leased furniture, ignored by her immediate family, broken-hearted and regretfully withdrawn from the one passion of her life, alone in nearly all of her judgments. No one can even be bothered to recollect her past, which they stomp over in careless gossip. Here is a passage where insensitive, amnesiac, mindless social speculation treads down the one defining regret of Anne's life. It is only after this passage that we learn that Wentworth (the curate's brother) is Anne's former fiancé, and can put back into her thoughts the precise agony of overhearing this frivolity and being herself the only one with the right word.
"'[The new tenant] is sister to a gentleman who did live amongst us once; she told me so herself: sister to the gentleman who lived a few years back at Monkford. Bless me! what was his name? At this moment I cannot recollect his name, though I have heard it so lately. Penelope, my dear, can you help me to the name of the gentleman who lived at Monkford: Mrs Croft's brother?'
But Mrs Clay was talking so eagerly with Miss Elliot, that she did not hear the appeal.
'I have no conception whom you can mean, Shepherd; I remember no gentleman resident at Monkford since the time of old Governor Trent.'
'Bless me! how very odd! I shall forget my own name soon, I suppose. A name that I am so very well acquainted with; knew the gentleman so well by sight; seen him a hundred times; came to consult me once, I remember, about a trespass of one of his neighbours; farmer's man breaking into his orchard; wall torn down; apples stolen; caught in the fact; and afterwards, contrary to my judgement, submitted to an amicable compromise. Very odd indeed!'
After waiting another moment--
'You mean Mr Wentworth, I suppose?' said Anne.
Mr Shepherd was all gratitude. 'Wentworth was the very name! Mr Wentworth was the very man. He had the curacy of Monkford, you know, Sir Walter, some time back, for two or three years. Came there about the year 1805, I take it. You remember him, I am sure.'
'Wentworth? Oh! ay,--Mr Wentworth, the curate of Monkford. You misled me by the term gentleman. I thought you were speaking of some man of property: Mr Wentworth was nobody, I remember; quite unconnected; nothing to do with the Strafford family. One wonders how the names of many of our nobility become so common.'There is nothing to decode here, no brilliant close-reading is possible. It simply has not been worth the time of the others to enter into, to recall, the central event of another person's existence. And this is all Austen is, is showing us these facts about selfhood.
Being a self in Austen is not something that one will be thanked for; it requires "resources for solitude," i.e. interests and concerns that have been forged in privacy; some compass of taste and decency not to be pulled out of deep currents by a moment's distraction; and, tautologically perhaps, being a self is a case of "like recognizing like." The vapid, pointless non-entities that rattle their jaws through the entire Austen corpus, may be morally evaluated on entirely other standards--but put two serious-minded fans of Byron in a room together, and they will find each out and recognize their value over the others.
As in the world, having a personality is something with infinite pitfalls (not only pride, prejudice, and sensibility--or Emma's insensitivity--the Crawfords, Wickham, and William Elliot are more or less charming sociopaths), something that by and large socially we have to do without (the workplace is a great testimony to the rarity of personalities). Austen's task is to work out all the permutations of having-a-personality, being-a-self, which (I repeat) is far from a moral value, indeed usually collides with morality at some point. The question is how to be a self with duration, depth, and self-reflection while surrounded by an incessant, unperceiving din of clichés and misinformation. How to be recognized (in a Hegelian way, by another one like me)? How to not tip over into solipsistic megalomania? And finally, how do we live with the inane, the careless, the tasteless?
To recap: Austen's world is not an idealized "period piece" or decorative stage for the unfolding of romance. It is a howling bestiary, or a bawling nursery of self-enforcedly one-dimensional mental infants, in which love and friendship are just names for the rare collision with another real, substantial self.